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Styling and Profiling
When I look back on old pictures of the kids in my family I get a good laugh, but mostly I fall in love with our outfits. My mom loved to shop, so we were definitely stylish, but what I loved was that we looked like little kids; no labels plastered across our chest, bottoms and backs—the closest we got to that were underoos. In 2011, that’s just not the case and I grow increasingly frustrated with shopping for CJ. After a recent trip to Herald Square (a very rare occurrence) I came up with this list:
1. Labels: My child is not a bulletin board for your name brand, or whatever you want to call it. He is a child and his Polo shirt shouldn’t be the first thing people see, (have you seen this new logo?). I don’t make it a point to buy well-known brands (unless I get them from Marshalls or TJ Maxx) and at this rate I never will.
2. Thug appeal: Now look I’m from Brooklyn, so everyone including our kids own “Timbs” and a Champion hoodie. I’m positive that this is in the Brooklyn handbook (maybe even the New York handbook) but when I see 5 year olds dressed in sagging jeans (skinny or otherwise) and coogie sweaters I get upset. Kids don’t need to look like they are off to the club, or to the block to hustle. Cut it out.
3. Expensive footwear: I’m not focusing on Jordan’s. I am talking about high-end designers like Prada. I can’t see myself paying Prada money for CJ to scuff up. I’m that chick that used to clean her sneakers with a toothbrush. So, can you imagine how neurotic I would be over sneakers that expensive! LORD! Why don’t kids wear shoes anymore? My penny loafers were my best friend.
4. Embellishment: While on this shopping trip I saw jeans with jewels and intricate threading on the pockets and down the sides. Why? That just seems like a way to keep kids distracted: look at the pretty little sequins. Trust me, CJ doesn’t need any additional distractions he’s good.
5. PRICES: I am a frugal shopper, but by no means cheap, so when I see a $30 T-Shirt I immediately pause. Once I gather my thoughts, I’m out. Sneakers for $120 for him to outgrow in two weeks, nope. $60 for jeans that he will run and slide in causing holes in the knees, NOPE.
These are things I’ve faced while shopping for CJ. Thankfully I have many alternatives here in NY. For his jeans, I still go to The Children’s Place. They are always on sale. I also shop at Osh Kosh. I use the double coupon days they offer. During the holiday season I was able to get CJ a sweater for 21 cents! You can’t beat that. The prices are definitely a big draw and the quality of fabrics used can’t be beat!
Lastly, is my old friend Daffy’s. A lot of their stock comes from Europe and if you get in early it’s a mommy’s paradise. I hope this guides some parents away from the hip hop attire and back to dressing kids like kids not mini me’s.
More styling featuring Moi
Only the finest for me.
When CJ started kindergarten in September we were anticipating homework from day one to get him in the groove. I wasn’t expecting anything big but maybe a worksheet to finish from the day. That didn’t happen. His new teacher eases the kids into work and homework started around mid November. I spoke to a few parents and they were not happy about it (neither was the Mr.) but I just felt like it gave me more time to get him up to speed.
I was lucky to have a friend whose son also had the same teacher, and she saved all of the homework projects (SCORE!) and gave them to us in the summer. Even though I had them I can honestly say I didn’t stick to them like I should have (*sigh* I’m such a slacker sometimes) but I did utilize other tools that really helped. Here are a few of my favorites.
Writing:
CJ has known his alphabet in song since he was 2 years old, he sang it all the time. He could even identify the letters as long as they were in order. As he got older he started to be able to identify them even out of order but not as easily, that has since changed. The next step was to get him writing. I can honestly say that I felt defeated in that before we even got started because CJ is left handed. I psyched myself out with that and thought if I could teach myself to write really clearly with my left hand it might help (it did a little) but what really made the difference were these cards.
These cards are often used by kids in Montessori programs and are made of sand. The cards have a coarse touch and allow the child to feel what writing the letter feels like. CJ didn’t like them at first complaining that they hurt his finger tips but I can assure you they are not rough enough to hurt, my son can just be a tad dramatic. Now he loves them and when I take the box down he’s ready to go. Even though he has now mastered writing the letters I still use the cards and think I will way into at least the first grade. The cards run about $35.00 on Amazon and are worth the investment. For the DIY moms out there here is a link for making your own: DIY Sand Letters.
Reading:
So we got to a place of ease with writing letters thanks in part to the Montessori sand letters and CJ’s teacher introduced with the first batch of homework the Dolch sight words. Dolch sight words are the 220 most common words and 95 nouns found in children’s book. The Pre-Primer and Primer words should be mastered by the end of kindergarten to give a comfortable start in 1st grade reading. I was kind of excited about this because I’m a big reader and I read to CJ every night so CLEARLY he is going to take to this like a fish in water right? UHM yeah not at first. We started with flashcards, he took to them for all of a day before just getting silly and not wanting to use them. I was frustrated, my husband was BEYOND frustrated and that only lead to CJ being frustrated. So what did we do, we turned to technology, the iPad to be exact. There are tons of apps to be used but the most basic and distraction free is ABC Sight Words.
This app contains sight words from Pre-Primer to 3rd grade and has a separate link for Nouns and cost nothing! It’s one of the best free apps we’ve used. Easily navigated a voice guides the kids through each word allowing the kids to hear the word, each letter (when touched) and more importantly trace each word. This app saved a lot of lives on the way to summer camp(how’s that for a review). Once he was comfortable using the iPad we added the flash cards back into the mix.
So this has worked so far, the challenge is keeping him from getting bored, tired and frustrated. I have a few tricks up my sleeves though. I made myself a promise to review all the tools I’ve been using good and bad because I’m sure I’m not the only parent out there trying to figure it out.
This Mommy blog is a safe have, a room all my own where I can get all things mommy off my chest. I haven’t been here in a few months and I kind of miss this place. This year has been anything but easy in the world of a working mom but it’s been an adventure nonetheless. So here it goes a quick recap:
- CJ turned 5 and we had a ball. Though there were a few glitches his party was everything I imagined. Family, friends and good food yes a success.
- CJ started Kindergarten! With the exception of the one pushing incident and the brown boy comment he has had a very successful transition. His teachers love him, he’s picking up the academic work quickly (sometimes lazily) but it gets done. He’s a smart kid so I don’t worry too much (besides he knows his momma is not afraid to release the Kraken on his ass)
- We’ve started eating a greener, healthier diet and CJ loves it. Though every now and again he wants a sandwich for lunch (Nutella is the rage) he is equally as happy with a salad and veggies.
- Bento Boxes for lunch make the difference, GET INTO THOSE MOMS!
- Christmas was battery free, not a video game not one battery insight. We’re trying to encourage CJ to use his imagination more.
- I still battle with the Working Mom vs. Stay at Home Mom bit but I don’t care anymore. I do what’s best for my family so screw the people who don’t pay CJ’s tuition.
So what’s next? I don’t know. I really am working on reading with CJ and it’s been a fight because I still expect him to just get it (HUSH I KNOW HE’S FIVE). I’m working on it. I’m going to do my best to do the following in 2012:
Keep you updated the working mom life. My everyday struggles are real and now with my fancy iPad I can update more often (YEAH WORD PRESS).
Tell you about products I’ve used to guide us in reading, writing and math with CJ. As well as for the moms keep you in the loop about how I stay in shape w/o that much time on my hands.
HAPPY NEW YEARS TO ALL!
We're doing less grains but this works.
This week CJ started his first week of school and for the first time in his 5 years we’ve had to pack lunch. At first I was not to thrilled about this but I remember school lunches and yeah I just had to suck it up. I want him to have awesome healthy lunches so that he can focus throughout the y and not feel sluggish.
The first thing I I did was sit down with the little man to plan lunch and snacks for a month (it’s really just two weeks, I’m not super woman) keeping in mind our new Primal lifestyle. WHOA, let me tell you this was no easy tasks. First CJ and I had to have the battle of the PB&J, he wanted to take them I had to explain peanut allergies *palm to head*.So I got him a nutella snack, he didn’t like that and we were able to scratch the idea of PB&J as a whole. Two days later we came up with this lunch plan (only one week below)
Monday: Grilled chicken breast with veggies.
Tuesday: Tuna fish in lettuce wraps. (Thanks Jaded)
Wednesday: Salad with grilled chicken.
Thursday: Pizza Roll lunch boxes (not the crappy ones from the fridge, Pizza roll up.)
Friday: Salad with all fruits and veggies. broccoli, corn etc.
I tell you this is a fancy lunch for a 5-year-old, I know some adults that don’t eat this well, but it’s worth it. It’s a win win for us all because I can take the same lunch and even leave one home for the Mr. #winning.
Bring on the school year, we’re ready for you!
On 7/10/2011 CJ turned 5 and we celebrated in style with all of our family and close friends. Though exhausted we had a ball and I couldn’t have envisioned a better day. This post however is not about the party in details but about the people who helped me pull it all together and some shameless plugging for their businesses 
But before that I have to say my husband is the best! He came in took a 20 minute nap and ran with me until the last person was gone. He was visibly exhausted and still he kept going. I do love him so.
First my family, without my sisters Keisha and Violet I wouldn’t have been able to get through that day. They were cooking, hosting, cleaning, just doing it all without asking what needs to be done. I’m pretty lucky to have them.
My mom for frying the best chicken EVER! I tell you that woman needs to quit her day job and get into food business, her chicken is slap your momma GREAT! I can fry some chicken but my mom puts me to shame ANY day. I love you Mommy, thanks for always being there.
My niece Ari put together one of my favorite guessing games. The kids loved it and some won more candy *sorry parents*. It was a hit! And my niece Ki won the peppermint M&M, which I wanted. LOL
My bud and CJ’s awesome godmother Adia for coming out early, getting me drunk and helping with everything from set up to grilling. She’s a great friend and I love her. She’s always welcome out to the country house and there will be tons of lavender soap and Game of thrones episodes for you to watch undisturbed.
The Jaded Nyer, K and N! She and her two daughters came on an early train popcorn maker in tow and popped and filled all the goodie bags with yummy fresh popped popcorn. Did I mention she came from Brooklyn!!!! Look at how cute the bags turned out!
The candy was in the bottom, had to fool the kids.
They are awesomeness, CJ, Black and I are glad you’re in our lives.
A few years back I reconnected with a friend from JHS through facebook and she’s made the cupcakes for CJ’s past two parties. This year’s carnival theme brought us red velvet cupcakes with red and white frosting, they were delicious and the minis were a hit with the kids. And after all the candy they took in that was definitely enough. I didn’t get a pic of the 5 dozen we had but the most important part is right here. Super cute!
Sassy Sweets, (347) 576-5132. Tell her Krishna sent you.
Last but not least a friend so close she may as well be family, and her sangria. The adults thank you for their sanity! I usually hate red sangria but this one was pretty tasty. I’m sure my sister V had something to do with that red being there *side eye*
Email her :Kikiskickinsangria@gmail.com Follow on twitter KikiKickinSangria
Thank to all of you, despite the few glitches everything turned out wonderful and I’m glad you were apart of it all.
No one can tell me this kid is not HILARIOUS!
Every Mother has that moment where they just want to stop and cry. You might have it after something really bad happens or when your child (ren) aren’t being the perfect angels you imagine they should be ALL the time, so what do you do? Some women cry, some do breathing exercises, I turn to music.
Music always makes things better in my world and I have a playlist for everything. On occasion I still play the list I put used when I was in labor( Lawd that thing saved my husbands life!) but I have a list for that moment when I’m about to crack, its called The Mommy’s timeout list and it’s gotten a lot of play lately. Here are a few tracks from it and why I listen to them
* Golden by Jill Scott : This song makes me dance. If I’m dancing and singing I usually forget what I was mad about.
* I’m every woman by Chaka Kahn: I love this version more than the Whit whit version. It makes me remember that I can do anything. Even tame an unruly child if need be.
* My Joy Chrisette Michelle : Reminds me of how little and precious my child is and that he won’t always be that but he’ll be the best thing in my life.
* Bad boy swinging Luther Vandross *see first song* Plus when CJ hears me singing Bad Boy swinging he gets nervous.
* Native New Yorker by “Odyssey” uhm hello this one is tre obvious, No? Wellbesides the feeling of nostalgia that washes over me, the lyrics speak to what being a tough NYer mean. I know the score, I’m a native New Yorker
Lastly, “Dancing Queen” by Abba I can’t explain why this song makes me so happy but it’s been my go-to joy song for a VERY long time. When I play this song I usually forget why I was upset in the first place.
Do you have a Mommy timeout play list? If so what’s on it?
I have a killer sweet tooth and during certain times of the month I will go to Hades and back for salt, these are bad habits that no matter how healthy I eat I’ve never been able to shake completely. I acknowledge it and that’s the biggest step. As a mother and admitted sweet tooth junkie I am often torn on what I will and won’t let C.J eat. How do you tell a 4-year-old he can’t have anymore ice cream when you’d like to have another bowl? It’s hard and it takes a lot of will power.
I’ve been blessed because with the exception of onions (definitely my child) and tomatoes (hmm is he mine?) C.J will eat pretty much anything. I’ve watched as my friends struggle through the veggie, milk battles with their kids and I have to thank God for never having to go down that road. C.J would rather fight with me about what shoes he will and won’t wear (yeah definitely my child) . I say all this to bring up the fast food debate I had with a few non-parents. I’m of the school that a parent needs to make the choices, because what kid doesn’t want to spend every day in (insert your favorite fast food restaurant) eating and having fun? I’ll wait while you figure it out……..
The answer is none. All kids want to have milkshakes, nuggets, fries and a cool toy. But it’s not necessarily the best meal for them, and too often parents get busy, lazy whatever and just settle for the quick meal. I’m guilty of it, even though CJ has fast food so few times in his short life. And when he does, I make sure to opt for the healthier alternatives. We make a plan that looks like this:
- If he has the grilled chicken wrap, he can have milk and half the side of fries.
- If he (and he often does) opts for the kids happy meal, he has nuggets, apples and milk. NOT CHOCOLATE milk, plain white milk. And of course this comes with his fancy toy.
I’ve realized that this is a small battle in keeping him fit, making smart choices now will give him the tools to do it on his own once he gets older. I’ve been trying to drive home the message that fast food is not a replacement for a healthy meal at home, it is a convenience that we will not abuse. Let’s hope he remembers this as he gets older.
